Early yesterday morning, I received a warm text from my dear friend telling me that she would be coming home to Mississippi, but just for the weekend. They had planted their roots now in Oklahoma near relatives of theirs and would be returning to bring with them back all of their belongings from their family home. If your a long time follower of mine you may remember her being the close friend of mine whose sweet daddy passed away in April, if not and you would like to catch up, read HERE and HERE but be sure to grab your tissue box. I was quickly excited as soon as my ears filled with the great news, but quickly let down as I thought about what this ultimately meant. This was it, my best friend was establishing her new life in Oklahoma but now for good. My heart broke again I won't try to hide that fact, I had settled in the fact before this news that yes, she was living her life too many hours away from me but I had also settled comfortably in my heart that yes, she does still have a home over here with belongings-she will be back. But now I'm just not so sure.
This morning, of course, I had to go see her. I hadn't seen her since the funeral, and no we really didn't talk too much during the time in between I sadly regret, but our lives obviously went different directions and in a hurry. Life gave us a full plate, sadly more heavily on her end of the table. When I reached the screen door to her house I like any other time, looked toward her daddys recliner to find that he wasn't there. It broke my heart, and flash backs from seeing her suffer that sad day came rushing back to my memory. That house would forever be stamped by his memory, and I could understand how staying would only make things harder along with the fact that they absolutely had no family really at all now that they could still call family in this town.
There are a many of reasons along with new ones of why they are having to leave it all behind now, and if I were in the position she is in, I honestly would do just as she is doing. It saddens me that the circumstances she has encountered with family members have caused her to relocate her whole life, but at the same time.. she is happy, and that is really all that matters, isn't it?
Reading through my Kelly Minter Ruth study this morning upon leaving to see her, my eye just happened to catch the corner of the page that read: Although there will be weeping in this life, the direction in which we weep is what truly matters. I have no doubt in my mind, God drew me to this study because He knew I would need help coping with this new change in
my our lives.
I was being selfish, I was angry and I couldn't understand why things had to up and run the direction I just couldn't agree with. She isn't just my best friend, she is my sister, we grew up building each other up throughout lifes many speed bumps, and now we would only be losing contact slowly drifting apart I could only imagine throughout the years to come. Distance wouldn't be my friend would it?
I realized then that I had to be happy for her. Yes, this part of life isn't easy to say the least and my friend is still weeping and will battle this sadness for as long as it takes, but the good thing about her weeping, is she is weeping forward, just as Ruth and Naomi. My friend, just as these two legendary women in the bible, lost it all and life is granting her a new beginning.I can't hardly argue with that. It hurts but deep down it is well with my soul and I know that God will provide opportunities of reuniting us somehow, although I did fall apart on the drive home from her last hug.
|She would punch my arm if she knew I shared this|
but it sure makes me laugh when I wanna cry
God sees my tears, I can cry and I can wipe them, feel them.. but I won't let them stop me.. it is possible to cry and walk.